Beans, Beans, the Magical Fruit

The sort of secret blog of Beans, a.k.a. Jules, a.k.a. "Legs for Miles" a.k.a. "Rackie the Boob Queen." Fine, ok, not the last two. Starting July 2006, sometimes "Mike," aka "fagadoccio," is a co-poster on the blog. The co-poster child, really.

Thursday, October 11, 2007

Is There an Opening on the Nobel Committee?

A few days ago in his blog, Diner's Journal, Frank Bruni wrote about restaurant names. Sometimes ridiculous, he says, but sometimes satisfyingly clever, as in the case of a newly opened New York restaurant specializing in small plates and bar food, called BARFRY. Or, to be fair, BarFry.

I agree that there are names that make zero sense or piss me off. To the Wicker Park restaurateurs who named their restaurant Ear Wax Cafe, I can only say, What, Diarrhea Central was taken? What are you thinking?

But of all the restaurants in New York, to come out and praise BarFry was amazing for the following reasons:

1) It literally contains the word "barf," and looks like "Barfy."

Thanks, Internet. I KNEW you'd find something creepy and disgusting!

2) It is a pun on the term "bar fly." Hence, it evokes both

an infectious pest, the fly

and the subject of the metaphorical term, a lazy dirty drunk

3) The specific way it puns on "bar fly" with "Bar Fry" makes it sound like someone making fun of a Japanese person speaking Engrish. As someone who has never EVER EVER answered her cell phone "Euuuuh-- HERRRROOOO???" I find this totally offensive. Just kidding! But I find it brazenly, cluelessly impolitic for Bruni to give it the Clever Name Award, especially when the place apparently does have a menu slant toward Japanese. What's next, Frank, Most Tasteful Placement of Shar-Pei Puppies Award to David Hasselhoff?

(I'm fairly certain this is not photoshopped, either. Just pure, glorious, well-lubricated documentary.)

In short, WELL PLAYED, Frank. The best-named restaurant in NY is Barfry, but only because Throw-Up Rat Chink hasn't opened yet.

One more time:


Tuesday, October 09, 2007

Don't worry, you don't need special training

Bye, everyone.

I am leaving to go become a scientist. I know what you're thinking. "What kind of scientist, Jules? The cancer kind? The AIDS kind?"

No, friend. I am going to be the kind that gets in a pair of goggles and slowly makes friends with a baby rhesus monkey.