Leaving Finland

Dear Diarrhee,

I am leaving Finland tomorrow morning. Hopefully no terrorists will want to fuck with us. If there's one group no body's gritting their teeth to take down in a glorious political blaze, it's probably the Finns.

Geez, I've learned so much here this vacay! Learned how to bring in a big fish, how to party like the natives, and how to handle 2 months alone in a pine box with one's parents. I feel like I'm at least 50% of how smart I was when I got here. Sigh.

Now we are packing up the house, not to be unblanketed and dedusted until next summer. The downside is, it's hard work. The upside is, we have like 25 beers to get rid of.

See you back home, homies!

PS Could someone please give me directions to the United American States? I believe it was founded by Amerigo Vespucci. I know I leave my house and turn LEFT, but then...I would appreciate directions if someone has them. My address is: My House, Finland, North Europe, Europe, World. Thanks, all!

Jules